Sweet Peter on a Popsicle Stick
I haven’t written for very many weeks. Heaps-lots of weeks, in the words of the wise Mack.
To be honest, it was because I honestly hadn’t had anything to write about and I didn’t want to bore you all with angst or boring musings about the world and everyone in it.
In summary, though, for those that care, I’ve been studying and working steadily and having both good and bad weeks. Thrilling, isn’t it.
I won’t lie, this won’t be a long entry. I just figured I’d write something in case people thought I’d died. I really still wonder how this blog averages over 100 pageviews a day even when I’m inactive… maybe it’s my header image, or my display pic. Tom Hardy has incredible drawing power.
But never fear, all you who like to actually read entertaining and interesting entries… I have a very busy and incredibly awesome “long weekend” planned which I will undoubtedly document upon its conclusion. Thus far, plans look to go as follows:
Friday 13-04-12:
3pm-11pm – Work [not particularly exciting but it does help to lead on to the rest of my plans... I'm going to assume some of you will facepalm at just how busy this weekend is and this is thus the best place to start. Also any Friday 13th makes things exciting, I think]
Midnight-*3am* – Midnight Dinner a la Cirque des Rêves [for those who've read the AMAZING AND INCREDIBLE book The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern, you'll know what I mean. For those who haven't... it's a secret invite-only dinner, first course served at midnight, dress code black and white only - with some red permitted - and the menu is no revealed until it's served. To be honest I am beyond excited for this]
Saturday 14-04-12:
7:30am-*10:30am* – Roadtrip with Dove and Neems [three gloriously insane girls roadtripping down to Hamilton for the Armageddon there... in costume no less. Dove and I plan to go as Aziraphale and Crowley, respectively. Photos most certainly coming later]
Sunday 15-04-12:
aaaaaaall day – Enjoying Armageddon [not much more to be said here that hasn't already been said.]
Monday 16-04-12:
sometime around the midday/1pm/2pm/3pm mark [hanging out with Master Four for a long-awaited and much-needed movie-swap and general bumming-around-like-the-lazy-asses-we-are day]
So yes… exciting stuff. Surely some photos to come and if anything some stories too. Stay tuned for those still following actively. Thanks for your patience *salute*
Songs this week:
-+- Losing My Religion – R.E.M.
-+- Run Daddy Run – Miranda Lambert (feat. Pistol Annies)
-+- Abraham’s Daughter – Arcade Fire
BLOGS
|| Collecting a Library || Jack || Lochinvar ||
LINKS
||| 1001 Books || The Midnight Screening || Random Acts On Campus ||
Bandit, out.
The Lineup
A while back I had an entry listing my favourite movie/TV characters, and I mentioned then that I might make an entry similar, but with book characters instead. Not by popular demand, you understand, but just to make an interesting entry for an otherwise completely uninteresting week before I hit exam mode and by proxy mucho stress and ramblings.
The problem with book characters – as opposed to film ones – is that unless the book has been adapted (usually badly) or someone has made some rather amazing fanart to it, it’s hard to describe a character physically. And a lot of people – myself included, so not judging here – like to judge a character by their appearance as well as their qualities. So… I’ll attempt to describe them as I saw them as I read the books, using actors people either know or can easily look up, in hopes of enticing visually-stimulated readers to check out my list of amazing fictional characters.
Keep in mind that like the other entry, this is just a list of SOME OF THE CHARACTERS I like. By FAR not all of them. These are either the ones I always tell people about or the ones that came to mind first at this rather ungodly hour of the morning for most people. For me it’s still rather early, but I have an appointment with my linguistics tutor in a few hours to discuss the transitivity of verbs and the S structure of adverbials so… maybe sleep is a good idea at a decent hour.
ANYWAY before I go off on yet another tangent that will bore my readers to tears, here it be:
Including but not limited to novels, graphic novels and comic books
The Phouka
In My Mind: Tom Hiddleston-[with darker skin]-meets-Eames-in-an-alleyway
From: War for the Oaks
By: Emma Bull
This is probably one of the only characters on this list for whom finding a fanimage is damn near impossible. It’s beyond me why more people haven’t read this book, I adore it beyond words and recommend it to pretty much everyone I know. The Phouka is faerie, he’s a sprite, he’s a trickster, he’s a wonderful shapeshifting smartass who wins the heart of anyone and everyone who reads him on the page. Phouka is charismatic, he’s funny, he’s ridiculously sympathetic and he’s a character who makes me adopt his mannerisms and speech patterns every time I read the book (which is so often it’s potentially unhealthy). I’ve been meaning to write this book into a screenplay since I read it the first time, because I would love to see this made into a film. I’d only trust Tarsem Singh (The Fall, The Cell, Immortals) to helm it, but I would love to see it made.
Anyone who’s read the Hunger Games trilogy would assume that of all the characters to choose to represent the series on my list, Haymitch isn’t the first that comes to mind. But if I’m honest, the series astounded me with more than just its plot and absolutely stunning ideas, but with its minor characters. Arguably, Haymitch isn’t a minor character, but he’s not one of the first to come to mind when one asks for main characters. I love Haymitch because he’s real. He won the games 24 years ago, he’s been drinking himself slowly into the grave since, and hating life when every day he wakes up alive again after nightmares upon nightmares of the games he won and years and years of seeing young kids go to their death from their district. Haymitch takes no bullshit and gives none, his advice to Katniss and Peeta is “stay alive”. Nothing more nothing less. I can’t actually tell you why I love him so much, but he was battling Cinna and Finnick for this space so something about his humanity must’ve rung true. I’m well aware that the film has been cast, but I disagree with 98% of the casting so I cast him as I saw him in my mind.
This is technically an internet graphic novel, not a book, so finding images of Doc Worth are a lot easier than of any of the other characters so far. There are tons of fan communities for Hanna, and I have to agree with the casting by the majority of the fans… Paul Bettany would work the shit out of this character and have a ball doing it. I’ll actually use Tessa’s description of Doc to make it easier and more entertaining. Disclaiming right this very instant that the following passage is NOT MINE. “Doc Worth did the whole fancy going to medical school thing for a while, until he realized that dressing nicely and remembering a bunch of ‘useless crap’ wasn’t really his style. So he dropped out, fell out of touch with his family and started a practice in a dark alley somewhere while simultaneously deciding that all of his coats needed to have a line of fur on it for absolutely no reason except maybe that it made him look sorta dingier and skeezier.”
I read this book yonks ago and it’s another of my all time favourites to reread and recommend to people. Especially if they like reading, considering the plot. Guy is an interesting character for me because he’s easy to relate to. Yes, he goes through the typical hero growth-arc; first he follows along with orders, then starts to think for himself, then starts to understand the pull towards breaking the law and why he did it previously… it’s hard to explain. Something about Guy makes you like him and, for a while at least, pity him. I know that this has been adapted before, but if I’m honest I am too scared to watch it in case it ruins my beautiful imagery that I’ve built up in my mind for such a long time… I’d like to see Cillian act him, he’d work very well.
In My Mind: John Malkovich
From: Prisoners of Power (Inhabited Island)
By: Arkadi and Boris Strugatsky
I am positive that besides Q no one else will know this book. It was thanks to Q that I found it and read it, actually, so thank you. It’s difficult to describe the Strugatsky brothers’ work… this is the first book of a trilogy, but you can read all books standalone; it’s a melding of science fiction and dark satire of society; it’s actually not my favourite book in the trilogy but I happen to like Strannik in it the most. Also he loses his “title” in book 2 (Beetle on the Anthill). Strannik is a difficult character to explain because he is so shadowy and UNexplained. For most of the book you have no idea who he is, he’s probably considered a minor character even though he’s the key to the entire book in the end. He’s not a villain, he’s not a hero, he’s both. It’s damn near impossible to relate to him but he is so fascinating that I doubt it’s possible to outright hate him.
This is one of the few books which I loved just as much as the film adaptation, and it’s probably the only book where I will cast the character as he was cast in the film adaptation. Why? Because I saw the movie first. But believe me when I say that it is so beautifully and perfectly cast that I wouldn’t be able to recast the Narrator if I tried. The Narrator is never named in the book. It’s written in first person and whenever someone refers to him it’s either with use of a pronoun or as “Jack” which isn’t his name but rather a name taken from an article the Narrator reads in both the book and film that he adopts to describe himself. The Narrator is – scarily, for those who’ve read the book/seen the film – probably the only character I can relate to to the point of frightful accuracy. Insomnia has never been described so well. The Narrator comes close to being an “everyman” (to quote another book which I don’t plan to review/talk about on here) but in the most twisted and convoluted way… I won’t spoil the ending here.
In My Mind: Lee Pace and Michael Fassbender
From: Good Omens
By: Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman
Yes, yes, cheating post, I know, sue me. But if you’ve read the book you know that you can’t have Aziraphale without Crowley and vise versa. For those freaking out over slash, no, not in that way, though I know most of the female fandom of Good Omens sees them this way all the time. I don’t. I just love them as unlikely best friends and allies, being an angel and a demon as they are. These have to be two of the most beautifully crafted characters I’ve read in a long time; they’re fleshed out, they have enough history to fill books (and do, if you’re religious with a sense of humor) and they are FUN to read. Easy to relate to? Not unless you gave away your flaming sword to Adam and Eve as they were kicked out of the Garden of Eden or threaten your plants into growing. Highly entertaining duo nonetheless.
I know this was made into a film also and there are no words for just how much I HATED and despised that adaptation and its casting. Holy mother of Christ. If you even think about watching the film before reading the book you may potentially be dead to me forever after. Just saying. Urgh. Henry is one of the most stunning, powerful and complicated characters I’ve ever read. I haven’t been able to make it through the book a second time because I know that I’ll cry from about the midway mark again and I’m not sure I’m stable enough to handle that much pain at the moment. It’s the author’s skill that made Henry’s non-existent disease not only believable but believable to a point that you forget that it doesn’t exist. The way Henry handles Chrono-displacement, the way he explains it to others, how he goes about SURVIVING with such a thing… there are just no words for how amazing he is.
My God, can this be? A FEMALE character on the list? That’s right, there are few female characters I like in books and Wanderer makes the cut. If Haymitch hadn’t've made the list earlier, Katniss would have been first in the female line, but alas. I say this every time I recommend this book to people – which, like the rest on this list, is often – DO NOT JUDGE THE BOOK BY ITS AUTHOR. That sounds ridiculous but it’s true. Forget that Meyer ever wrote that shit called Twilight. This is a brilliant book, don’t let your Twihate cloud that. I did for far too long and I regret not reading it earlier. Wanderer is interesting in a number of ways, first and foremost in that she spends most of the book as not only herself but Melanie also. Wanderer is a soul. Technically she has no body unless she possesses one, but this is about CHARACTERS… as a character she’s incredible. She’s lived so many lives, on so many planets, and seen so many things that she didn’t understand before coming to earth and taking over this powerful, desperate human who teaches her things that her poor soul essence had never encountered. For those who know the book… yes, I cast her as her final vessel. I always cast Melanie as Sophia Bush.
Like Fight Club, I agree with the casting on this, so it’s staying. I read this book when I was quite young and reread it recently and I adore it. Q said she saw a stunning theatre performance of this and has been unable to forget it since, and I can only imagine how beautiful that must have been. Dorian is interesting to me because he grows so much as a character and because of just how LONG it takes him to do so. He’s arrogant, young, foolish and nothing he does will kill him. To a point, it’s easy to understand what he did and why, and even – for a time, at least – for length of time he did it for, but at the same time it doesn’t take long into the book before the reader is feeling uneasy with all the things Dorian does, takes for granted, and forgets. I love it because it’s a logical and frightening take on beauty, sexuality, irony and immortality, and it’s presented through a beautiful, young face.
Sweet. God. That took a while. I’ve been at this for about 3 hours now and I swear there will still be more typos in here than I’d rather see. Ah well, makes it genuinely and legitimately mine then. Like I said before, this is barely grazing the list of characters and books I love, but I can’t go over 10 before I hit a ridiculously huge word count and start to nit-pick to the point of nauseating boredom. The last few characters on any list are the ones you fight for and chew over for a long time. I’ve missed tons of characters I love, but that’s due to list restrictions.
If you made a list who would you include? If you know/like any of the characters I’ve listed… do you agree with my casting? Yes, I’m desperately trying to get my followers to talk to me again on here. One can hope right?
In Other News…
I’ve signed up for NaNoWriMo and you can find me right here if you’re keen to follow updates and get excerpts. Wish me luck!
My story with Jack is now at 377,465 words and we’re still going strong. Yes, it’s an obsession, yes, it’s ridiculously long, no, I’m not making the word count up, no, I have no idea if and when this will ever end, yes, I will keep updating the word count, no, you don’t have to care.
RAOC had a documentary made about it by a student from South Seas Film and TV School. That’s right, the same South Seas that I went to in 2009 and graduated from. The director was lovely and I can’t wait to see the finished product. Keep you posted on both here and the RAOC website so check in on the link once in a while.
I have no new reviews in The Midnight Screening this week. However I am going to watch a movie with Q tomorrow night that I’ve been waiting for a very long time so chances are I’ll review it upon my return.
“1000+1 Books” has a few more books. I add to it when I feel like it, since this isn’t a review page, but it’s always a good place to go if you can’t think of your next book to read. For much better (and very informative) reviews, check out Collecting a Library, she never lets me down.
Incidentally, don’t forget to check out the new entries from Jack (who has promised an entry, finally) and Lochinvar too. Show em the support and love they deserve, guys, these blogs are amazing.
This week’s songs are :
-+- Till I Collapse – Eminem
-+- Everything to Lose – Dido
-+- Sing It Out – Switchfoot
Stay classy guys, till the day after next Castiel day… (correction as requested by Mack)
Bandit, OUT.
The Times They Are A’Changin
So I’ve been absent for two weeks for a number of reasons, many of which I won’t get into today but suffice to say it’s been a tough two weeks. A lot of change, and for those who know me quite well, I don’t do well with change. I need time to adjust. So I guess this is just a general entry to say that I’m still alive, that I do plan to continue this blog in some capacity, and to let out my general thoughts on the changes going on around me and how I plan to deal with them.
Feel free to ignore the entry, it might be changed to a general personal entry at a later date.
So. First and foremost… I’m moving house. In two days. An opportunity came up for me to move in to a place of a decent size with an affordable rent and people I like, and I took it. Considering the entire decision process happened in the space of less than 3 weeks – from announcement of a free room to actually moving in – I’d call it radical to a degree, but it would be unfair to say that I didn’t plan this out. I’d been wanting to move out for a while now and, like previously stated, this presented a good opportunity for me.
I won’t lie and say I’m confident, I’m scared out of my mind, but that could easily be due to the short time it took to organize more than anything else in particular. That’s not to say I’m not excited though. I’ve been talking to my new flatmates (two of whom I don’t know very well yet) quite frequently through Mack (my other, third, flatmate who I do know quite well) or through social mediums and I’m confident that we’ll get along fine. If worst comes to worst I can hole up in my new room just as I hole up in this one and leave everyone be. Here’s hoping it doesn’t come to that though.
I do have an astounding amount of cutlery that I’m taking with me (8 forks, 10 knives, 15 spoons of varying types and styles, if I recall correctly) and I’ve got a much finer appreciation of thrift stores again. My only other issue now is job hunting and budgeting. Again, for those who know me well, me and money don’t mix well; as soon as I have money I feel the compulsive need to spend it. And it’s not that I’m a shopaholic, I don’t spend on anything in particular, it’s more the urge to make the money material than anything else. So budgeting is going to be fun, I’ll be sure to keep a pretty constant twitter feed about it so stay tuned if you need late night entertainment.
Besides switching locales I’m also thinking about the future a lot more now that it’s nearing the end of my first year at Auckland University. It’s kinda scary how time flies when you stop noticing it. One second it’s March and I’m trying to find where the science building is, and the next it’s October and I’m weaving through four shortcuts to get to a lecture on time. Also it’s nearly time to choose classes for next year and I’m on the edge of my seat for the date applications open. For those who don’t know, psychology fills up ridiculously quickly at this uni, and considering I would like to major in it (along with linguistics) it would be highly beneficial for me if I got into psychology for my second year.
I did a quick scan of the classes available not ten minutes ago and set up a brief first draft of a timetable just to see. If all goes to plan I’ll be taking three papers of each of my majors for the entire year (two for linguistics in semester 1 and two for psych in semester 2) as well as a creative writing paper to keep myself sane and potentially a dance paper for my general education and “fitness requirement”. This is all, as I said, if all goes to plan. We all know how well Murphy’s Law and I get along so I refuse to name my chosen classes or call anything definite until it’s in electronic format that I’ve officially gotten into the classes I wanted.
Then I can shuffle my timetable and angle for a few more free days throughout the week.
In Other News…
It’s Q’s birthday tomorrow!! I know she’s not excited by this news but I am. There’s a chance I’ll take her out to play pool for a while; we both need to relax and hit a few sets of balls with sticks for a while in a controlled and safe environment.
My story with Jack is now at 336,189 words and we’re still going strong. Yes, it’s an obsession, yes, it’s ridiculously long, no, I’m not making the word count up, no, I have no idea if and when this will ever end, yes, I will keep updating the word count, no, you don’t have to care.
RAOC had a documentary made about it by a student from South Seas Film and TV School. That’s right, the same South Seas that I went to in 2009 and graduated from. The director was lovely and I can’t wait to see the finished product. Keep you posted on both here and the RAOC website so check in on the link once in a while.
I have no new reviews in The Midnight Screening this week. I really need to get my ass into gear with this again…
“1000+1 Books” has a few more books. I add to it when I feel like it, since this isn’t a review page, but it’s always a good place to go if you can’t think of your next book to read. For much better (and very informative) reviews, check out Collecting a Library, she never lets me down.
Incidentally, don’t forget to check out the new entries from Jack (who has promised an entry, finally) and Lochinvar too. Show em the support and love they deserve, guys, these blogs are amazing.
This week’s songs are :
-+- Colder Weather – Zac Brown Band
-+- Sing It Out – Switchfoot
-+- Thistle and Weeds – Mumford and Sons
Stay classy guys, till next Castiel day…
Bandit, OUT.
The One And Only Time Rugby Will Appear On This Blog
…and that’s so I can rant about how much I can’t stand it.
Right now the Marching Bands of fucken Manhattan are practicing circuits behind my eyes and everything is fuzzy so I’ll make this quick.
For those who don’t know, the Rugby World Cup is on and hosted by Auckland in New Zealand. If you don’t know about this, then congratulations. This means you are either in the 0.2% of the world that hasn’t decided that headline news is now Rugby or you don’t live in this country, which makes your life pretty much one-up mine by the nth degree.
Now, why I’m writing about this.
Since we’re hosting the cup this year, our city’s been flooded with tourists and sport fanatics from pretty much the world over for the 6 weeks the damn thing is on. Because of this, our city has changed its bus routes, changed the way you PAY on buses, cleaned up the streets, covered buildings in shiny designs proclaiming that “the world is here to play” and force fed “country pride” down the throats of anyone living in the City of Sails (currently City of Rugby, where the World is Here to Pay).
To be honest I am so beyond sick of hearing about the damn thing that there are no more words. I was in Real Groovy with Master Four the other day searching through the vinyl collections there before he had the good sense to drag me out by the scruff of my neck before I spent any more money on music, and this guy randomly comes up to us and starts telling us how “the last tiem da All Blacks plaid it wz against Aussie and dem bastards cheated” (exact transcription). Now, honestly, who the bloody-fuck cares?? We’re in a music. store. This is where they sell things that belong to something called culture, which you, random guy, have no concept of.
Today was the opening of the games and fans were everywhere. 98% of all cars had flags of the teams they support on them. That wouldn’t be such a huge deal, if people hadn’t gone as far as to drive and HOLD THE DAMN FLAG OUT THE WINDOW AT THE SAME TIME. Not only that, but this isn’t a tiny fan-flag, this is a full-blown actual-size flag. Hanging out the driver’s window. Held by the driver while he’s driving. That is pretty much obscuring any view of any rearview mirror of any car in front of them. Kudos, guys, way to show the world how things are done in NZ.
Although I’ll say that I’m pleasantly surprised and very happy to find that a large number of guys I know agree that the hype is not only annoying but highly embarrassing for Auckland. Thank you, gentlemen. Most of you even dress well. I feel honored to know you.
Urgh. I’ll stop before my head splits open. I’ll try my utmost to not make the next entry angst or short but fuck… if the fans screaming outside my window don’t shut up in the next 20 minutes I will find a hammer and smash them till they die.
In Other News…
My collab with Jack now sits pretty at 226,317 words, there are drunken idiots screaming outside my window, my head feels like it’s about to split open and I really truly madly deeply want to listen to Super Psycho Love again.
RAOC has some amazing things upcoming, so watch this space and the website for details on that as it happens!!~
I have no new reviews in The Midnight Screening this week. I am on break now though so chances are I will at least get a chance to WATCH films again.
“1000+1 Books” has a few more books. I add to it when I feel like it, since this isn’t a review page, but it’s always a good place to go if you can’t think of your next book to read. For much better (and very informative) reviews, check out Collecting a Library, she never lets me down.
Incidentally, don’t forget to check out the new entries from Jack and Lochinvar too. Show em the support and love they deserve, guys, these blogs are amazing.
This week’s songs are :
-+- Super Psycho Love – Simon Curtis
-+- Set Fire to the Rain – Adele
-+- Home – Mumford & Sons
Stay classy guys, till next Castiel day…
Bandit, OUT.
The Projections Are Circling…
I’ve done a few posts about writing on here before, and Lochinvar does them much better than I do, but let me talk about something that every one of us experiences, not just writers.
Projecting.
We do it all the time without even realizing it, it’s a psychological coping mechanism. What’s interesting about it is that when normal people do it, they project certain emotions onto certain people and then move on once the uncomfortable feeling or mood has passed them by. When writers do it, they project their angst and disturbances on to their characters.
Now, where a human being can retaliate, react, get angry or try to pacify the other person, characters on a page don’t have that power. They’re stuck absorbing all the anger and pain into their very being; black on white, typed out and saved as. What’s interesting about these projections is that once they’re on paper, they never leave you. By the time a writer has reached a certain maturity in their field (they could be 50 or 15, depending on their experience) they have a whole collection of projections to juggle and work with, interchange and swap with others.
While writing my collab story with Jack, we both noticed a particular trend where the characters we invented for the collab were projections of ourselves at certain points in time. That’s not unusual, if you’re a writer. Just imagine you have to write an angry scene between two characters on a day when everything went right and your only thought is of how amazing life is. It won’t be a very effective angry scene will it? Same as attempting to write a beautiful romantic reunion after being dumped on your ass.
What I’m talking about, though, is not regular day-to-day projection, but recurring projections. Ones that seem to “save” your emotions for use whenever you feel like accessing them. Currently in the story we’re working on we have two main characters who change with us daily (and have the ability to be molded to specific emotions if scenes demand it) and a few minor ones who we use as anything from conversation topics to foils to specific emotion projections. What’s amusing, is that we’ve figured out how to work the minor characters so well that both of us can voice them at different times without people realising we’d changed writers.
What’s worrying is that some of the things we project on to our characters are emotions that neither of us want to believe we have.
It’s interesting that accessing the subconscious has become so easy for us while writing this story. It started as a way to pass the time, less than a month ago now, and has since ballooned into a 132,480 word (as of 3am Saturday morning) monstrosity that is keeping us both sane. For those who know me personally, you can probably roll your eyes and not be wrong… every moment of every day that I have spare (when I’m not actively studying or in lectures) I’m on my computer typing or on my phone emailing parts back and forth between Auckland and California. I pretty much live in Jack’s timezone (5 hours ahead and a day behind me till the 22nd of September when we will blissfully return to a 3 hour 1 day difference that will make writing much easier between continents) and see the world through the eyes of my characters. What’s more, I MISS my characters when I’m not writing them.
It makes me think, though, that if this story is actively keeping me from going out of my mind, how did I deal before and how do I plan to deal once our muses run aground (which shouldn’t happen for another few months at least)? For me, emotions have always been hard to say but easy to write. I have 9 diaries and thousands of handwritten pages to prove this. So I guess I would go back to writing entries instead of inventing lives of characters who I will never be or ever meet. Though, if I’m honest, my latest character is basically me in 6 years time but in male form… so I may never be him but I can always hope to meet him.
I actually don’t know how non-writers deal with projecting… can you tell me? I know I have a mix of both writers and non-writers following my blog so I’d love to know. How do you project emotions and feelings? DO you? Is it through a medium or communication or suppression? Did the idea in this entry even make sense to you? Feedback loved and wanted, danke schon!
In Other News…
RAOC has its first (official) meeting on Monday 22nd of August (that’s this coming Monday) at 5pm in Clubspace, Auckland uni. Come if you can, bring friends, tell others. People overseas are not exempt from the meeting, we talked about this.
I have no new reviews in The Midnight Screening this week. I have one hell of a week heading my way (2 assignments and 2 tests all clumped together over 2 days) and I might not get a chance to review till the mid semester break.
“1000+1 Books” has a few more books. I add to it when I feel like it, since this isn’t a review page, but it’s always a good place to go if you can’t think of your next book to read. For much better (and very informative) reviews, check out Collecting a Library, she never lets me down.
Incidentally, don’t forget to check out the new entries from Jack and Lochinvar too. Show em the support and love they deserve, guys, these blogs are amazing.
This week’s songs are :
-+- Home – Mumford and Sons
-+- Wrong – Depeche Mode
-+- I Will Follow You Into The Dark – Death Cab for Cutie
Stay classy guys, till next Castiel day…
Bandit, OUT.
Pouring Sunshine and Rage
Exams are looming. I have one tomorrow which I’m less worried about than the one on Monday next. After a day of mixed emotions – and studying – I decided to take a break and watch a film for a change, instead of something short or devouring a book overnight yet again. I think it was in Easy A that the main character notes how it’s always ironic that the book you’re studying at school is the exact metaphor for what you’re going through in life at that point in time. It just so happened that I chose the perfect film to watch that matched, confirmed and argued against the exact thing I happened to be studying today.
What amused me most in our clinical psychology lectures was that scientists spent so long trying to define abnormality (the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Disorders has 17 categories of abnormality as well as over 200 subcategories) that they never actually got a clear definition of normality. So the scientists who are deeming some people clinically insane have no “normal” to compare their patients to, it’s wonderful. As always with humanity everything is perfectly logical and makes all kinds of wonderful sense.
Obviously there are certain things that are abnormal no matter where you are – this is transcending cultural boundaries too FYI – such as murder and rape (although this one doesn’t transcend time, as back in medieval times the “wandering uterus” could only be cured by a “magical penis”. If you think I’m joking look it up, I’m serious) but some things are ambiguous even in our “fully developed Western Nations”. One of these things, in my opinion, are delusions.
In many cultures, the idea of hearing voices, seeing things that others can’t see and “knowing” things humans aren’t meant to know are not considered illnesses, they’re considered blessings. Many tribes in Africa still take certain herbs to induce states like these to communicate with their ancestors and gain knowledge of the world around them. In our society that would be deemed “substance abuse”. Obviously silene capensis is no heroin, but the general idea is the same: take a drug, see things that aren’t there. But even if it’s frowned upon, drugs are an explanation for seeing or hearing things that aren’t there. When people claim to hear the voice of God or see angels or monsters without any form of drug in their systems people tend to panic.
I actually still don’t understand why Joan of Arc wasn’t killed as soon as she’s proclaimed that she had heard the voice of God, considering she was burned as a witch later for no reason whatsoever. But like I said, humanity has the most infallible logic.
Maybe it’s the idea of “fearing the unknown” and rejecting anything that can’t be explained away by science and cold hard fact, but a lot of people who are diagnosed as delusional are of perfectly sound mind, they just happen to see or hear things that others don’t. What really gets me, though, is how picky we are with the people we choose to lock away. Religious leaders who claim to have a direct personal connection with a deity are worshiped and seen as people to strive to be like, whereas people who honestly seek help for seeing terrifying things are put away and kept hidden because they would otherwise “upset society and disturb the people” with the things that they see. What if those things that they see are the things we should be paying more attention to?
“Abnormality is traits that society deems unacceptable.”
It’s really weird to me how a majority of people suddenly make up the entire society that has the right to choose exactly what it deems normal and abnormal. Personally I think a lot of things that people deem abnormal are perfectly fine. Apparently talking to yourself without the aid of a cellphone (or once in a while a real live human being) is strange and “disturbs” some people. I talk to myself all the time when I edit or read or walk around town. It’s a way to get ideas out and talk your way through situations. Everyone does it, it’s just that most people don’t voice their discussions aloud. Why is that weird? Because “most” people don’t do it? In ancient Rome it used to be beautiful for two men to love one another, most people did it. And now? Why did that trend suddenly die out, considering we think of the ancient Romans as some of the smartest and most advanced people of their time?
My head hurts. Study is going to kill me once I get up in 5 hours.
In Other News…
I’ve sent in my first draft of my art for the Big_Bang 2011!! Can’t show it till my story and art get published on the site (15th June). Once it’s up I will post a page for it on here and link you. Stay tuned if you’re interested!
More amazing actors have joined the cast of The Hobbit. I never thought that so many brilliant people would be in this shitty spit of land at one time again since LOTR ended. Now not only is Lee Pace in the country, but Benedict Cumberbatch is also here! Martin Freeman and Richard Armitage remain in the cast and make me very happy. Fingers crossed for seeing em “accidentally” on the Roadtrip Of Epic Awesome. Starting June 26th, stay tuned.
I have three new reviews in The Midnight Screening this week. Check out K-PAX (the film that inspired me to ramble on here today), Keith and X-MEN: First Class while I drown in my exam period before returning with more reviews. I have watched a few more movies but had no time to review them. A lot of them were ones I’ve reviewed on here already anyway. Stay tuned for more when they come along.
“1000+1 Books” has a few more books. I add to it when I feel like it, since this isn’t a review page, but it’s always a good place to go if you can’t think of your next book to read. For much better (and very informative) reviews, check out Collecting a Library, she never lets me down.
Incidentally, don’t forget to check out the new entries from Jack and Lochinvar too. Show em the support and love they deserve, guys, these blogs are amazing.
The Hope to Haiti project run by therandomact.org is still in full swing. We need all the support and love we can get, it’s a wonderful cause. Please visit us on the site, or check out this blog post for details on how you can help! They’re off June 20th, but it’s still an ongoing project that I am incredibly proud to be a part of.
This week’s songs are:
-+- “Manic” – Plumb (title from here)
-+- “Хлоп-хлоп” – Наутилус Помпилиус
-+- “Sweet Dreams (Are Made Of This)” – Emily Browning (Sucker Punch OST)
Stay classy guys, till next Castiel day…
Bandit, OUT.
There Was Never A Day That Goes By That’s A Good Day To Die
What’s this? An entry on Saturday?? Ridiculous. How can this be?
Put it this way, if I had posted on Thursday as I usually do, it would have been both a short and boring entry. Short because my head was splitting open and I could barely see in front of me, and boring because I hadn’t done anything particularly blogworthy until today. So, if you will, excuse the Saturday post. Here’s hoping it was worth the wait!
This entry was born from 2 events:
1) I had finished the Hunger Games trilogy this morning at 2am and
2) Master 3 had his birthday party today. We went paintballing.
It’s not the first time that I’ve wondered what it would be like if I were ever in a war-like situation. Not in a situation where I would voluntarily enlist in the army/navy/airforce, but in a situation like Tomorrow When The War Began, where out of nowhere a war just started and it was fight or die. Every time I’ve imagined the situation, I’ve been realistic: I can’t run fast at all, I have no endurance for cross country or heavy arms training, but I can hide quite well and am very quiet when I want to be. In essence, I gave myself less a fighting chance and more a hiding one. Either way, in all scenarios I had myself live for at least a day before I bit it.
Ages ago I started a trilogy called The Hunger Games trilogy. I found a PDF of the first book online – because the book is impossible to track down in this country – and read it overnight. It was incredible. A mix, for me personally, of Exodus, The Wind On Fire trilogy and Battle Royale, it was just the kind of book I knew I would love from the off. And the fact that it was written spectacularly and had characters you actually gave a damn about helped as well. At the time I had no idea that this was part of a trilogy, the ending was quite complete, in my opinion, and I actually was quite averse to reading the other two (I’ve read enough trilogies in my life to know that more often than not, the second and third book don’t live up to the greatness of the first). However, when I got Catching Fire (book 2) in the mail from Jack as a late birthday gift, I devoured it overnight as well. One of the few times where I will eat my words. Book 2 may have even surpassed book 1 with its power and imagery. I was stunned. Obviously I had to get the third book right away. And, as luck would have it, I found a copy (one copy, one) and ordered it in. Got it last night. Finished it this morning.
The reason I bring this up, is because in the book – without giving much away – every year 24 children aged between 12 and 18 are sent to The Hunger Games, which is essentially a televised giant Battle Royale-style arena where they have to kill each other off while surviving the “Games” that are dotted around their prison to help with the deathcount. Since there can only ever be one winner of the Games, 23 children never make it. A few that go in think it an honor, they spend years training for the opportunity to die in front of a live audience. Most go in preparing to fight or die, because they have no choice.
Reading the trilogy really got me thinking that if I were ever unlucky enough to end up in the Games, I would be gone within the first 5 minutes. I can’t use any weapons, I can’t run fast enough, I have no idea which berries are poisonous and which are edible… I would freeze to death on the first night if I even survived that long. Going into the paintball games today I was prepared to be struck out fairly quickly – as this was a one-hit-you’re-out rule game – and I was right, but at the same time I realized that in a war, I wouldn’t live long enough to even move from my base without injury.
Technically the hits I got today weren’t mortal injuries: I got two direct hits to my left leg below the knee and one very close-range shot just above my wrist on my left hand. Considering I played five games and only got struck out in two (the two hits to my leg hit at one time from the same person) I could say I had “survived” the first day. If the game was less social and more accurate, in a way, I would be alive but not well. But I would be alive. I realized that I am much better at defending than I am at attacking; I am very good at keeping a surge of enemies at bay from behind cover than I am at advancing on a base. Course, in war you never really get a choice of whether or not you’re defending or attacking.
For those who care, yea, the paintballs hurt like a bitch when they impact. My hand in particular hurt like nobody’s business and bled for a while. I love the bruise though, it’s the most awesome thing I’ve worn since I got new Levis.
So… if a war was to hit Auckland tomorrow, we would all be completely unprepared. I think, though, that as I am a person of “extreme situations” I might do a lot better in war than I give myself credit for. Maybe I’d be able to hide long enough to get out of the warzone and seek help. Maybe I would find a friendly base and work on communications. And to be really honest, I’ve always wanted to be a sniper in any war game I ever played with friends.
Let’s just hope a war doesn’t suddenly strike. Or that America holds out long enough for it to turn to Panem, meaning I would be dead by then and not in danger. Unless I was in 13… urgh.
In Other News…
I had my final day of semester one yesterday and I actually can’t believe how fast time has gone… honestly what the hell?? And now it’s exam season, which means this is Bandit-freaks-the-fuck-out season because Bandit and exams aren’t friends in any way shape or form, unless you count deep depression and shitty grades no matter how hard you study friendship, in which case we’re bosom buddies.
I’ve sent in my first draft of my art for the Big_Bang 2011!! Can’t show it till my story and art get published on the site (15th June). Once it’s up I will post a page for it on here and link you. Stay tuned if you’re interested!
I had a weird burst of inspiration the other day when I heard Nostalgia by Dave Gahan, to cut Mr. Nobody to it. And I did… withint 4 hours. It was the fastest video I have ever cut, but I am incredibly proud of the results! All opinions are loved and respected, thank you!!~
More amazing actors have joined the cast of The Hobbit. I never thought that so many brilliant people would be in this shitty spit of land at one time again since LOTR ended. Now not only is Lee Pace in the country, but Benedict Cumberbatch is also here! Martin Freeman and Richard Armitage remain in the cast and make me very happy. Fingers crossed for seeing em “accidentally” on the Roadtrip Of Epic Awesome. Starting June 26th, stay tuned.
I have no new reviews in The Midnight Screening this week. I have watched a few movies but had no time to review them. A lot of them were ones I’ve reviewed on here already anyway. Stay tuned for more when they come along.
“1000+1 Books” has a few more books. I add to it when I feel like it, since this isn’t a review page, but it’s always a good place to go if you can’t think of your next book to read. For much better (and very informative) reviews, check out Collecting a Library, she never lets me down.
Incidentally, don’t forget to check out the new entries from Jack and Lochinvar too. Show em the support and love they deserve, guys, these blogs are amazing.
The Hope to Haiti project run by therandomact.org is still in full swing. We need all the support and love we can get, it’s a wonderful cause. Please visit us on the site, or check out this blog post for details on how you can help! They’re off in June, but it’s still an ongoing project that I am incredibly proud to be a part of.
This week’s songs are:
-+- “War” – Hurt (title from here)
-+- “War” – Poets of the Fall
-+- “Coming Undone” – KoRn
Stay classy guys, till next Castiel day…
Bandit, OUT.
Welcome to the Shadow Show
- Shadow Show, Clifford D. Simak, 1953
—~+~—
I doubt you will know who Simak is, let alone have heard of this short story. I myself only heard about it through word of mouth and have wanted to read it ever since Q gave me the summary in that completely mesmerizing way that she explains things and makes you instantly want to read them. I’d heard about it ages ago, but never got around to reading it. The man reason being that in the Russian translation that Q read, the title was somewhat different to the original English publication title, so I haven’t been able to find it until now. But due to a sudden brainwave, time, and master four’s expert torrent seeking help, I finally found it and read it last night.
I was blown away. All I can say is that I am astounded by how closely I could relate to the story. I said once that I write to find out who I am, and I read to see if anyone else has discovered it for me. That’s true for every day of my life; even when I don’t write or have writer’s block, I still read, and many of the things I read are things that I try to find myself in. So far, I haven’t succeeded. There’s always something a little off that isn’t quite who I am, in both my writing and reading ventures, but I’m not going to give up. Every story I write and every story I read brings me closer and I pick up pieces that help me later along the way.
Shadow Show was stunning in a number of ways, but really hit close to home in the way the main characters had alter-egos with which they projected themselves anonymously to the world. I’ve known that my characters are part of me for a long time. An idea that has crossed my mind a few times has been that the catharsis I get out of putting my characters through something is the same idea as dreaming and nightmares: in dreaming, our brain functions on a level where we don’t control what we see. It takes this time to sift through the problems we’re suffering and uses dreams and nightmares to work through them. We might not understand what our dreams mean, and some people don’t particularly care, but in this state of dreaming our mind solves problems we are unable or unwilling to solve in our daily waking life. To me writing is like that too.
By writing a certain character I put a part of myself I wish to heal into them. The things I put my characters through are things that I am trying to solve by myself, but need help in. When I write – if I write fanatically and get in the zone far enough that I need to be physically touched in order to pull away back to the real world – I don’t think. My fingers go a mile a minute on the keyboard, or smudge ink across paper and I don’t notice until I leave my space; until the sifting and resolving and healing is done. I think this is why I suffer so much when I have writer’s block; I don’t have an outlet to let all my emotions and fears and concerns flood out.
I’ve always wondered how people have viewed my characters. Like I said earlier, every character I write is me in one part or another, but only two characters to date have been based truly on me. These characters look like I do, they think like I do, they have my flaws and my pains and my sorrows and joys. They may be in situations that are unrealistic or strange, but the emotions they feel and the struggles they face are very real to me. Sometimes I put my characters through horrific tortures or agonizing introspective sessions; to me, the end result is a freeing of the spirit. To others, it looks like I’m a maniac with an obsession with pain.
It’s difficult to describe. It’s not even that I have a sadistic fascination with anything in particular, it’s just that sometimes writing physical, realistic disturbing imagery is an easier outlet than to mask my thoughts with euphemisms and woven psychobabble. This is one of the reasons that a lot of my work of late has not seen the light of day. Or, if it has, it has only been shown to a select group of people who understand why I do this and how exactly this helps me heal.
Other times I write exactly what I mean, but I don’t name my characters. “He” and “she” appear a lot in stream of consciousness work that I’ve grown fond of lately, and they’re always based on the same two people. I’ve actually started wondering if maybe he’s my muse or my inner voice of reason, because everything he says I remember, and everything he says helps me get through tough times. I don’t even think he realizes how much he helps me; he’s always worried that people might see him as pretentious or stuck up if they knew it was him I based “he” on in every story.
I remember when I was applying to UCAS while at AIC I wrote a cover letter for Stirling and Edinburgh and East Anglia, saying that I wanted to use my writing and combine it with psychology to help people. To heal people. It all sounds so stupid now, after reading this, but in the back of my mind, somewhere, I still believe I can do it; that creating a Shadow Show could potentially help people in ways that nothing else has before.
Considering all three universities accepted me – one with an unconditional offer – maybe they believe I can do it too.
In Other News…
I’ve had a shitty day. Honestly. Yesterday was one of those days where nothing went right and where nothing felt good and everything was hopeless. That article, plus a job interview that went well but not in the way I wanted it to go, plus other news that are mine alone and I won’t share here… it was a tough day where I honestly felt like giving up. So I wrote some more.
I’ve made the first draft of my art for the Big_Bang 2011!! I love it so far. Can’t show it till my story and art get published on the site (15th June) but once it’s up I will post a page for it on here and link you. Stay tuned if you’re interested!
Supernatural ended last week and I am actually very happy with how it went. A lot of fans right now are in the process of mourning, but I honestly think it ended how it had to – and should have – ended. Can’t wait till season 7… more for the fact that Jensen is directing the second ep of that season than anything else.
More amazing actors have joined the cast of The Hobbit. I never thought that so many brilliant people would be in this shitty spit of land at one time again since LOTR ended. Now not only is Lee Pace in the country, but Benedict Cumberbatch is also here! Martin Freeman and Richard Armitage remain in the cast and make me very happy. Fingers crossed for seeing em “accidentally” on the Roadtrip Of Epic Awesome. Starting June 26th, stay tuned.
I have no new reviews in The Midnight Screening this week. I have watched a few movies but had no time to review them. A lot of them were ones I’ve reviewed on here already anyway. Stay tuned for more when they come along.
“1000+1 Books” has a few more books. I add to it when I feel like it, since this isn’t a review page, but it’s always a good place to go if you can’t think of your next book to read. For much better (and very informative) reviews, check out Collecting a Library, she never lets me down.
Incidentally, don’t forget to check out the new entries from Jack and Lochinvar too. Show em the support and love they deserve, guys, these blogs are amazing.
The Hope to Haiti project run by therandomact.org is still in full swing. We need all the support and love we can get, it’s a wonderful cause. Please visit us on the site, or check out this blog post for details on how you can help! They’re off in June, but it’s still an ongoing project that I am incredibly proud to be a part of.
This week’s songs are:
-+- “Open Up Your Eyes” – Daughtry
-+- “Weightless” – Black Lab
-+- “Take Me Away” – Globus
Stay classy guys, till next Castiel day…
Bandit, OUT.
Demi-Gods and Hungry Ghosts
This week I am unashamedly going to write a general, potentially flaily, post. My brain is too far gone for anything remotely thoughtful and I honestly can’t bring my tired mind to dredge up more lecture notes to discuss right now. So feel free to skip the so-called “throwaway post” if you will, but comments are loved and welcomed, as always!
This past week has been uneventful but not boring. Sadly, most of my entertainment and excitement came from sources outside my university and lackluster social life. It came in the form of a message in my Tumblr inbox from a good friend of mine in Belgium who, remembering my obsession with all things Lee Pace, decided to inform me of the fact that that very man would be in New Zealand in a few short months. Why and how, do you ask? Well, he’s been cast in The Hobbit.
Now, I won’t lie, I’ve not been particularly excited by The Hobbit movie at all. I loved the Lord of the Rings trilogy, but I was never particularly keen on The Hobbit. I’ll watch it, of course, it’s not only New Zealand but Peter Jackson, but I never actively wanted to get on set or get a job there. Now I’m seriously rethinking my priorities towards this movie. If Lee Pace is in it, I would actually take a job scraping gum off the wheels of the trailers if I could be NEAR him. He’s one of the most talented, inspiring and beautiful (inside and out) people that I KNOW OF.
Which is why my fangirly mind instantly connected a few key words together. Namely: roadtrip + Wellington + these holidays. After the key words had a few days to brew in my brain, I decided that before I went to the capital I had to find out WHEN Lee would be in the country, to have a better chance of “meeting him by sheer coincidence on the street some time” (read: camp outside Weta Workshop like I once attempted to do when LOTR was filming). So that plan is still on hold.
Besides that, I’ve realized that every new sociology lecture is making me want to change my major. I blame Master Four for this. He will accept this blame with a warm batch of coconut cookies I owe him for saving my computer last night. But in all seriousness, people who are older and wiser than I am, is this normal? I love what I’m taking – especially now that we’ve finished social psychology and moved on to clinical – and I adore both my (current) majors, but I feel like I’m missing something… I have no idea what my calling is anymore.
In the last week I’ve been flung back and forth between about 3 different career paths that I could potentially take… and another nagging part of me is telling me to go back to editing and film work because that was my calling and will always BE my calling… and then I watched Departures the other day (unreviewed, I hadn’t the time, but brilliant movie) and the idea that “what I thought was my dream turned out not to be my dream” really freaked me out… because what if I don’t find my dream??
I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m interested in too much stuff.
Speaking of which, I’m finally working on my clip for The Host, which I am a little too excited about. I’ve had it planned since I read the book aaages ago, and I finally have my perfect music – thanks to Holmes – and my dream cast – thanks to my brain – so now all I have to do is force my hands to bring to the screen what my mind sees. I’ll post it on here as soon as it’s done. I really need to force my brain into concentrating like a laserbeam on my clip for The Fall but that’s working about as well as introducing slugs to salt.
I’ve come to another conclusion that my brain is on strike from being interested in too much stuff.
Fan-bloody-tastic.
In Other News…
The Hope to Haiti project run by therandomact.org is still in full swing. We need all the support and love we can get, it’s a wonderful cause. Please visit us on the site, or check out this blog post for details on how you can help!
I have no new reviews in The Midnight Screening this week. I’m really busy lately so haven’t had the time to actually WATCH anything (besides Departures). Still in a full-on Western frenzy, so expect reviews of The Dollars Trilogy (and many more) eventually.
“1000+1 Books” has a few more books. I add to it when I feel like it, since this isn’t a review page, but it’s always a good place to go if you can’t think of your next book to read. For much better (and very informative) reviews, check out Collecting a Library, she never lets me down.
Incidentally, don’t forget to check out the new entries from Jack, who really needs some bloggy-support for a new entry, Collecting a Library and Lochinvar, who also needs a gentle kick in the butt to get her new entry up. Call it a lovetap, if you will. Show em the support and love they deserve, guys, these blogs are amazing.
I’m still OBSESSED with VAST (Visual Audio Sensory Theatre), so this week’s songs are:
-+- “I Can’t Say No (To You)” – VAST
-+- “Land of Shame” – VAST
-+- “My TV and You” – VAST
Expect more diversity next week, promise!
Stay classy guys, till next Castiel day…
Bandit, OUT.
Merely Players
I’m the random one, the one who laughs in awkward situations or can’t stop laughing after everyone else has. The one who finds it very difficult to speak without sarcasm, who finds it difficult to read scientific reports and write short essays, the one who eats too much and drinks too little. Anti-sport, pro formal wear. The one who would rather curl up all day in bed with a book than party all night in the NZ binge drinking culture. I’m the one who speaks up in class discussions and enjoys getting critique more than praise on her work. The one who watches movies constantly and shows religiously. Milk chocolate. Feta cheese. I’m the one who would beat to hell anyone who hurt my friends or my family.
I know I’m all of these things, and many more, at different times and in different situations. Those are all part of my versatile collection of “selves” that I spend much longer choosing in the morning than what clothes to wear.
Every “self” is perfectly honed. I know every tone of voice, every walk, every demeanor, subtle smile, turn of phrase and sense of humor. I know how every single self moves and dresses, how it thinks and what it knows to feel. Every single self I have perfected and adjusted. Every single self has been developed to fit perfectly with the environment and the people it is meant for. Not one self would ever dream of taking something from another, there would be no need. If one self needs something I provide it. If I don’t have it, I work damn hard to get it. No self is ever wanting.
Shakespeare got it right when he said that all the world’s a stage. It really is. Every moment of every day is an act, a scene that we have to improvise. Most of us don’t even realize we’re doing it, we’ve gotten that good. And believe me when I say that’s the best place to be: unknowing. Ignorance, after all, is bliss. If you’re ignorant of your costume changes, your acting doesn’t suffer. If you wear your self like a second skin, you don’t get distracted by how it fits. It’s called a changeover. The movie goes on, and nobody in the audience has any idea.
Goffman hit the nail on the head next when he suggested that all scripts and scenarios are socially determined and known to the performer. After all, we’re all the stars in our own lives aren’t we? People come and go, cameos for a brief time because you allow them to be there. But you’re the leading man, the leading lady. The hero and the villain in your own self-composed soliloquy.
What becomes scary is when you step back from your life, take off your selves for the night, and instead of sleeping peacefully till the next curtain call, you lie awake and realize that without your second skin, you’re empty.
After all, who are you really? With your friends you are one self, with your tutors another. Family? There was a costume change at the door when you first came in, didn’t you notice the style shift? Every single scenario that you know instinctively has been meticulously worked out from the first time you were faced with a similar situation in a specific environment. The best thing about selves, really, is that they are easy to mold to whatever scene you need. A few bobby pins the first time around, and next time it’s a flawless performance. Why do you think there are matinées?
But when you’re alone, in the dark in the middle of the night with no one to see you or hear you, who are you? What is your self to your selves? What self are you when you have only you to perform to? That’s when things get tricky. That’s when the selves start jostling for a place, because performing for yourself? Well, that’s royalty coming to your opening night. You’re the one you have to impress.
And that’s when the selves start to rupture. Threads come undone when the fit is imperfect, the colors are glaringly obvious, the glances and subtle smiles overacted and jarring… That’s when the performance falls apart and you’re left with darkness. A gun and a pack of sandwiches and nothing. Curtain call.
And then in the morning you’re back. You take the dog out as your sleepy, exhausted self. You shower and get ready and leave the house without your keys or makeup as your student self on a bad morning. You enter your class and sit down a few seats over from where you usually sit, because your confident self has seen the handsome boy a few seats closer than yesterday. You eat lunch with your friends as your sarcastic self tells anecdotes and makes them laugh. You run to the bus a minute before it leaves, as the determined stereotypical student. Arrive home as the hungry and happy young adult. Walk the dog as the daughter talking to her best friend. Get to the computer to chat online as the confident, brilliant online persona.
And then you go to bed. The selves come off. And, since you’re alone, no one in the audience has any idea that you’re empty.
I look after my selves better than I look after my self. After all, I know exactly what selves I have, but who the hell am I?
–
References:
As You Like It [act 2 scene 7] – Shakespeare
The idea of “dramatic roles” – Erving Goffman
Fight Club – Chuck Palahniuk/David Fincher
Talk Show Host – Radiohead
If you can’t tell, I’m having somewhat of an identity crisis at the moment. I have no idea how this came about but there it is. It’s not fun and I am not in the best place right now, so I apologize for the angst this week, we’ll be back to your regularly scheduled weirditude after assignment week.
The Hope to Haiti project run by therandomact.org is still in full swing. We need all the support and love we can get, it’s a wonderful cause. Please visit us on the site, or check out this blog post for details on how you can help!
I have absolutely no reviews in The Midnight Screening this week. This coming week is “assignment and test” week before mid-semester break over Easter. And believe me, there will be a lot of movie-watching going on then. Expect some, if not many, reviews over that time.
“1000+1 Books” has a few more books. I add to it when I feel like it, since this isn’t a review page, but it’s always a good place to go if you can’t think of your next book to read. For much better (and very informative) reviews, check out Collecting a Library, she never lets me down. I was also thinking of maybe doing a music section too. Too much? Let me know.
Incidentally, don’t forget to check out the new entries from Jack, who really needs some bloggy-support for a new entry, Collecting a Library and Lochinvar, who, again, is late with her entry this week too. Show em the support and love they deserve, guys, these blogs are amazing.
On a final note… Knight In Shining Armani is still my highest-rated and most-viewed post on this blog of all time. It usually out-rates the latest entries by views weekly. I’ve been convinced that I simply must do a few spin-offs of this, as it were. One option is formal wear for men, and another is accessories. I do plan to do a fashion entry, but I’d love input as to which one I should go with. Let me know!
I’ve been addicted to Husky Rescue this week… I’m not sure what it is with me and seeking out the strangest tracks and finding beauty in them, but there you go. Currently hooked on My Home Ghost.
Stay classy guys, till next Castiel day…
Bandit, OUT.
How Do We Tell Apart The Time To Leave From The Time To Wait
Thank you to all of you for being, unknowingly, the participants of a socio-psychological experiment I hosted today.
As you can undoubtedly see, I’m posting my blog rather late today. Why, you might ask? Well there could be a number of explanations: I was busy, I forgot, I had no idea what to write about since this is “thinky thoughts week” and I felt the pressure… and all of those would be correct. But at the same time, I decided to put some of my knowledge of sociology and psychology to the test to describe a phenomenon that I hypothesized.
Now, before we continue, please note the following:
-+- this was a general study done for practice before psych and socio essays start to be due
-+- I do not in any way judge any of the participants (this will make sense as you read on)
-+- this is not an attempt to get more views/less views, merely an observation
As previously mentioned, there are a number of reasons as to why I posted this blog entry so late. Yes, I have been very busy lately, I’ve been working with therandomact.org crew quite actively on a new project (that I will mention later in this post) I have been catching up on my readings for uni (which have been substantial) and I have been working many long and late hours on a birthday video for a friend of mine. I also did forget to post, and remembered early this morning. This is actually the reason this experiment came about. And yes, in a way I was worried about what to write for this thinky blog.
But then I had an idea…
If I were to skip a day and not post until very late (if then), would anyone notice? If they did notice, would they care? And if they did care, then why? So I put off writing my entry to see what the day had in store for me. I wanted to see if anyone would email, txt or outright ask me why I hadn’t posted, because I remember once when I had legitimately forgotten to post last year, I got messages from a few people early in the morning asking if I was ok.
Today I got nothing. And it got me wondering, why not? Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to win pity points or shame you all for not asking if I was ok, I just wanted to know why at one point in my blog-life I got concern voiced over an unpublished entry and why this time I didn’t. Was it because no one actually reads this and just say they do to make me feel better? Is it because you’ve come to expect tardy entries? Is it because you thought someone else would ask and you were spared the responsibility? Like I said, got me thinking. Here’s why:
We were studying diffusion of responsibility – using the murder of Kitty Genovese in 1964 as a prime example – in psych today and I got cold shivers up my spine. For those not familiar with the definition, diffusion of responsibility implies that the more people there are present in a situation (such as a murder or a rape) the less likely they are to help or call for help. Scary, no? And it got me thinking, what if the situation wasn’t as extreme. What if, for instance, I didn’t post my blog today and went off the grid for a few days, no contact with anyone. Would anyone care or “call for help” as it were by asking around for me or about me?
And this is how the idea came about. I wanted to see if people as a collective, readers, people who comment, friends I know personally and friends I know online, would worry if I were to go away, vanish without a trace. Then I thought, what if I told people – via mass communication mediums such as Facebook or Twitter or Tumblr – that I wasn’t ok, that I was scared of something, or tired, or ill… would anyone ask then?
From past experiences where I have gone AWOL for weeks at a time with only one message on the mass communication web, I’ve found that only select people care. Again, this isn’t a pity party, more an observation. Is it because others don’t particularly care about how I am? Is it because they feel that others are “closer” to me as friends and thus it’s their responsibility to make sure I’m ok and report back? If it’s the latter, who decided this hierarchy and how widely known was it to the rest of the “collective”?
In the case of not asking about the blog post, is it because you’re used to an entry once a week and now take it for granted? Were you perhaps too busy yourselves to ask me about it? If this wasn’t my blog and was a more popular one like, say, Hyperboleandahalf, would you care more then? Or would that turn into diffusion of responsibility and no one would care at all?
I’ve come to the conclusion, after all that, that I like having a small fanbase (I’ll allow myself this moment of self-love), and that humanity as a whole scares me to no end. Which is why I am a moose.
—~+~—
therandomact.org has a new wonderful campaign running called Hope to Haiti which you should really take a look at. For more info, visit us on the site, or check out this blog post for details and how you can help!
I have only one new review in The Midnight Screening this week I’m afraid. Like I said before, now that uni’s picked up and therandomact.org is being as amazing as they are, I have very little time for the films that are like air to me. Check out my review of Leon: The Professional and await more new shiny films next week!
I also added a new page to my blog after much convincing from Lochinvar. The page is titled “1000+1 Books” and is a list of books that I adore with a sentence or two about why I like them. I did this because I tend to recommend books to people all the time and they forget which I recommended. So, here we are. It’s only got a few on there at the moment but the list will grow as I add to it. Mine are just a sentence each, but if you want to read amazing and brilliantly written book reviews, then you can’t miss Collecting a Library‘s blog.
Incidentally, don’t forget to check out the new entries from Jack, Collecting a Library and Lochinvar.
For those curious, the title is from Poets of the Fall, in honor of their new album today, Alchemy Vol. 1. A perfect thing to listen to if you’ve never heard Poets before, it’s their “best of” disk with two new songs. Seriously awesome stuff. Anyway…
Stay classy guys, till next Castiel day!!~
Bandit, OUT.
Cue The Sun…
I’m thinking I might do “really deep and thinky” entries once a fortnight rather than weekly, because you can probably tell that it takes me serious effort to ever come up with anything vaguely decent to philosophize over on here. People want the performance, not the effort behind it ;) so this week you’re stuck with a normal entry (with maybe a little thinkiness thrown in since I can’t seem to avoid it lately).
This last week has been insane. I can honestly say that I am truly without a doubt loving life right now. Uni is exactly as good as I thought it would be. I love walking around campus with a heavy bag and folders in my arms, I love coffee with friends, I love the fact that my lecturers are all, without exception, incredible, I love that I adore a subject I was coerced into taking, I love the burn in my muscles as I run up 5 flights of stairs at the end of most days so I don’t miss the last bus out of town, I love coming home and studying… I love it. Uni life is for me. I can’t remember the last time I was this happy, honestly.
I also happened to turn 21 last weekend, as most of you know. I think I freaked out over my 20th a lot more because I actually had time to think about it coming up. With my 21st, I honestly completely forgot about it until there were 2 days to go and I had to lug three cartons of beer into the house for others to drink. But the weekend was fantastic. My first – and most likely only ever – big party was a success! One thing that I really wish I could have changed, though, was the fact that some of my best friends weren’t there. That would have made my life complete. But alas, we can’t all sell mathematical pie on the black market, it will lose its value, and so I celebrated in my country with friends, and enjoyed the company of those not able to make it online later. Thank you.
Although I am almost laughably busy with university lately, I am about to get even busier! www.therandomact.org is about to put up their next round of videos once the final adjustments are made, and you should all take a look. The sheer amount and quality of the acts this past quarter has been astounding, and I’m really hoping it raises more awareness and gains more followers in my part of the world. I wanted to start a club for it at uni but I know myself too well, and know my crazy ability to sign up for too many things at once, and this club would be something that I couldn’t pick up and neglect. Another time, then. We also have a new intake of vidders and I cannot WAIT to start working with them! I’m not lying when I say that some of the most talented and brilliant vidders have joined my team this quarter, you won’t want to miss their work.
Another development is that I am now part of an 8-player online Diplomacy game. I am beyond giddy about this, I can’t even tell you. Be aware, this paragraph is all geekery, feel free to skip it. If you’re still with me, be prepared for jargon. The game was actually planned over L&P by the windows around my kitchen table by Individual, Rudyard and Red (names changed for confidentiality, of course) and I was recruited as the only girl when I came by in search of spicy samosas. This will be my third game of Diplomacy ever (I’m a Risk girl, although Individual is determined to convert me into a Diplo chick) and it’s a full-world map based in WWII rather than a Europe map based in WWI. I can’t say much more about it on here since Individual, the Game Master, hasn’t officially called the game to start, but I will be posting updates as frequently as they happen. Yep, I’m a dork, and this game will (hopefully) go for a few months. EXCITEMENT.
Aya is still my little pest. Today marks 3 weeks since we got her, and she turned 3 months on the 4th of March. She’s growing insanely quickly, and her energy levels seem to be in direct correlation to how tired I am at the time. Thusly, in the mornings at 6:30am she is bouncing around the house and barking and wagging her tail so quickly like a propeller that I’m scared she’ll take off, and when I’m fully awake and willing to play, she’s sprawled in the armchair hunting rabbits in her sleep:
She’s getting better with following commands now, still sits (her favourite command to follow) all the time in hopes of getting a treat (cheese), but she is getting better with “come here” and “time out” and has fewer accidents in the house. I think she’ll grow up to be a pretty calm and mature dog, but everyone needs a childhood. She’s actually very much like me when I was a child, and considering that I was a pest and grew up to be somewhat more manageable, I have my fingers crossed she will too.
Now, you’re probably wondering about the blog title. I tend to choose things that either pop into my head at the time of writing or I have them planned from days previous. This one is a mix of both… Only yesterday I was thinking (while making psych notes at my desk and drinking hot soup and drowning in used tissues) that my life lately is interesting enough to be viewed on TV. What the hell? you might be asking, which is fair enough… unless you’ve known me for a while. Ever since I saw The Truman Show at age 13, I’ve spent hours at a time thinking about how bored viewers would be if they had to watch my life.
If you’ve been with me since the blog’s birth last year, you’ll recall that most of that year was all angst and complaints and more angst and woeful soliloquies about how I will be alone forever and will die alone and unloved. Also forever. No one likes to read that, let alone watch it. But this year is working out magnificently. I’ve joined Argentine Tango class at uni, still vying for salsa as well (which would make my Tuesdays almost as busy as my Mondays but well worth the effort) as well as becoming part of AUSA, being elected as class rep for Russian and a potential for linguistics, acting as a note-taker for two people in one of my lectures… I love what I’m studying, I have an insanely active social life revolving around the uni cafe and pre-discussions of Diplo-planning world takeover on the phone till 11pm with Individual, and I’m happy. Yes, I have my off-days, but everyone does.
We could also argue (rightfully, if you remember my immortality post) that my getting a Twitter, being active on Tumblr, more active on Facebook and about 6 other online communities is a way to immortalize myself and portray myself to others through as many mediums as possible, and that in a way is having someone watch your life, right? All that without the scary and expensive cameras and fake world encased in a framework that can be seen from space… All I need to do now is decide that I love being single and as soon as I do someone will come along and life will be fantastic. But I tend to think about it quite a lot, so that’s something I have to forget about through more study and more coffee meets and the beginning of world domination on a WWII map. Easy!!
–~+~–
I have only two new reviews in The Midnight Screening this week I’m afraid. Did you see that I’m a little busy? No? Ah well… But while I find more time, you can read reviews of The Holiday and Life As We Know It and immerse yourself in girly amazingness.
Don’t forget to check out the new entries from Jack, Collecting a Library and Lochinvar. Although the latter needs a push in the right direction in getting the damn entry OUT this week :P
Stay classy guys, till next Castiel day!!~
Bandit, OUT.
Heroes Don’t Exist…
- Sherlock, Sherlock (2010)
—~+~—
This is one of my favourite quotes not only for its origin, but also because of it’s meaning. But more on that later, methinks.
I know for a fact that this entry is inspired by the film Enemy at the Gates (which I may or may not review later), but the idea behind it is one that I’ve thought about for a very long time: the idea of idolizing someone and making them into something they’re not.
No, I’m not so much a cynic that I don’t believe in heroes at all, I believe they exist more commonly than people think, but I do believe that sometimes we make someone out to be a lot greater than they actually are. I do it all the time, we all do it. We put actors and people we know on pedestals and see them as shining examples of human beings. But why? It is our primitive instinct of herd behavior playing up? Is it simply easier to have someone appear greater than you so that you have someone to look up to and strive to be like? It is because you don’t want to be a hero?
Personally I think it starts as an information cascade; someone will choose someone else to idolize and others see them doing it and join in. This is the same not just for heroes but also for political figures, trends, anything that societies crowd around. Q and I had a wonderful discussion last night with Lochinvar and her mother about why it is that people choose to follow a certain trend (be it fashionable or political or social) and we couldn’t come to a definitive answer. I claimed it was because people found it easier to be told what to do most of the time. But is that true?
In every historical event that involved a mass following (be this a world war or a rock concert) has always had opposition. The type of event dictated the strength of the antagonism and on how outspoken it was. The disputes about the Holocaust were received much differently to disagreements towards Yuri Shevchuk’s music, for instance, yet both types of opposition were valid and very much real. Why? Because both events had a mass following to bring this opposition about. Could it be said, then, that this opposition is yet another type of herd mentality? People choose to follow another trend that happens to go against the “socially accepted norm”, but they are still following a trend, are they not?
If it’s not herd mentality then certainly it must be that we need someone to look up to as an example, right? Let’s ignore for the moment that this is also blatant herd behavior, and assume that that is simply an umbrella for all the arguments brought forth in this post. The idea that we choose someone to idolize so that we can strive to be more like them is not a ridiculous notion, in fact, it’s one of the most ancient ideas in human history. Although I’m not religious, I know a lot of people who are. And many of them, maybe without knowing it and maybe consciously, strive to be like Jesus Christ. They want to be as virtuous and as kind and as giving. And that is in no way a bad thing at all. Obviously depending on what hero you choose to idolize will depend on what it is you’re striving to become. Note: what, not who. We’re striving, in essence, to acquire the characteristics of our idol (ie. to be kind and gracious and empathetic), not to become them. I doubt many people who strive to be like Jesus Christ actually wish to be him, for many reasons I won’t list. Also, if I have offended you with this paragraph I really do apologize, this is how my mind works, but I didn’t in any way mean to offend anyone.
My last theory is that we choose heroes and idolize them because we ourselves don’t want to become our own heroes. Being a hero is hard. Being a hero requires one to live up to the expectations of others, and everyone has different expectations. “You’ve promised people a victory I can’t deliver.” [Vassili Zaitsev; Enemy at the Gates] this is actually the quote that made me stop the film and start this entry. It’s the perfect example of a reluctant hero. The man knows perfectly well that as soon as he does something his idolizers disagree with, he will no longer be a hero, but publicly hated. And considering he never wanted to be a hero in the first place…
I know that many heroes I have, have earned that title because they are everything I want to be (returning to the second argument, their virtues, not them) and I won’t deny that others are my heroes because I need someone to follow and feel like I’m part of a collective (this would be the field of actors and artists and musicians who are well known globally). However, I don’t yet have someone I idolize who is there because I’m too scared to step up. I understand why it happens, heck, I’m surprised I don’t have someone who fills that role considering I’m rather cowardly in my approach to many aspects of life, but I don’t personally have anyone up on a pedestal that’s there to take the fall for me if they fail.
Now, back to the quote at the beginning of the entry. The reason I adore it is because I believe it’s correct. Heroes don’t exist. They’re a made-up concept in our minds like time that help us get through our lives. “It is man’s nature to be weak from the moment he is born. He will only grow strong when there is no one stronger than he is…” [Rumata; Hard To Be A God] I think it’s good, healthy even, to have heroes, to idolize certain people, to strive to become someone better based on a personally selected model, but I just know that as soon as the next “it” actor falls, or dictatorial government rises, the majority of people will shift their opinion and sell out their ideas. Because, after all, it’s in our genes to follow.
–
Wow that’s a little too much deep thinking for so early in the morning… I have class today as well, in 12 hours no less! Ah well, nothing like a good discussion to keep the brain from growing lichen. And I’ve had to do some spring cleaning in there recently since I’ve started university this week!! I can’t actually express in words how happy I am to be back in an environment where I can learn something. I love lectures. I love coming home and studying. I love people-watching from the library foyer. Right now my life is amazing. Also… I turn 21 this Sunday. When in hell did that happen??
In other news, I now have a Twitter. Yes, I conformed. Yes, I am immortalizing myself in the only pathetic way that my generation knows how (although I do have over 1500 pages of hand-written personal history so I can slip a little), but I did it so that I could get my straggly little ideas out as soon as I had them. I think Jack is getting sick of receiving millions of miniature emails consisting of a one-line idea for a story or something I saw in the city. So I got a Twitter so that I could record my ideas, promote people and organizations I adore, and to keep people posted on my happenings if anyone quickly wants to check up on how I’m going. The Twitter feed is on the right-hand side under the blog roll (right there!! over there!! It’s right next to this paragraph, see??) and it updates pretty much as soon as I post. So feel free to track me on that.
I have five new reviews in The Midnight Screening this week. Check out the reviews of Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog, Fight Club, Repo Men, Sherlock Holmes and Ten Inch Hero and take a break from all this rather depressing philosophy my brain dredged up at 2am.
Don’t forget to check out the new entries from Jack, Collecting a Library and Lochinvar. I know I promote them every week (and will continue to do so) but it’s really your loss if you don’t check them out. I don’t have dumb friends, and I don’t follow stupid blogs.
Stay classy guys, till next Castiel day!!~
Bandit, OUT.
To Let Go, Destroy You…
Dear Future, I bought you. I own the right to let go, destroy you, this is my life.
- Don’t Stop [InnerPartySystem]
Throughout the majority of last week I have been watching a show called FlashForward. Not sure how many of you have heard of it, since NZ never gets anything until perhaps five years later and from what I know FlashForward didn’t get advertised a lot in the States, but the premise of the show is that on October 6th 2009, the entire world blacked out for 2 minutes and 17 seconds and in that time saw their future. The show – which currently has only one season – is centered around people either trying desperately to make their futures happen, or trying desperately to avoid them. I won’t say any more, because the show is incredibly well woven and beautifully acted and you should watch it for yourselves, but I did want to touch on a point…
If you blacked out and saw your future for 2 minutes and 17 seconds, would you spend your time striving to get to it or working to avoid it?
The future is a changeable thing; I don’t think that we’re programmed to have a One True Path in our lives, because every decision we make changes our future anyway (yes, there is always the argument that you made that particular choice because it’s “written in the stars” and all that jazz but let’s not get into that now, I only have 1000 words to work with), so I think that if we were to black out for a certain amount of time and see the future, it would be less “the” future and more “a” future. That being said though, I’m not sure which method is the fastest and most efficient to get that particular future to come true: avoiding it or striving for it.
Ok forget your generic future, imagine this: in your future you saw yourself get hit by a car. That’s it. You didn’t see who was driving, you didn’t see what car, and you didn’t see if you lived or died after. You just saw a car come towards you out of nowhere and felt yourself fly through the air before you woke up. Now, if you go with the FlashForward idea that everyone flashed to the same day, at least you have an idea of when it’ll happen. But that’s all you got.
Obviously, most people would strive to avoid the car accident, they would check every road carefully, some would go as far as to not cross roads at all… but what if by doing that you’re setting yourself up for that particular future that you saw? What if on the day it’s meant to happen, you drive yourself (since in your future you weren’t hit IN a car, just BY one) to a friend’s house – maybe to celebrate that you’re alive still – and as you’re leaving your car, on the footpath no less, another car comes careening down the street, hits a car in the oncoming lane, that car spins out of control, hits YOUR car parked on the road and sends it at you, hitting you just as you saw in your vision?
The alternate option would, of course, be to strive towards being hit by a car. And since your vision claimed you would be hit by a car on a certain date at a certain time, does that mean that you are pretty much immortal until then, when that car can hit you? You can go both ways on this and say that yes, you are, since you remember in your vision that you were walking upright and feeling perfectly normal when you were hit, and you can also argue no, because the fact that you felt healthy then doesn’t mean that you didn’t get injured or hurt before that time and just happened to heal by then.
So what’s the fastest way to get to your apparent future?
Personally I think that avoiding it is the one-way ticket to whatever it is you saw. Why? Because it’s the law of life that whatever you don’t want to happen will happen to you. So if I ever black out for 2 minutes and 17 seconds and see something, I will either strive to avoid it if I want it (helloooo Lee Pace proposing) or go for it with all my heart (say, getting my car totaled). There is always the off-chance that you’ll see nothing in your flash… if that’s the case then I would do everything on my bucket list and strive for death. Who knows, you could escape it by just being so damn happy that death is scared of you and goes to seek out some emos to munch on till you calm down.
All jokes aside, though, if I had the choice to know my future or not to, I would choose not to. I just have this crazy fear that if I see something good it will never happen to me, no matter how much I avoid it or strive for it or neither, I just fear that it’ll never happen. And if I see something bad I just know it will happen to me. Why? Because like I said, the law of the world is you never get what you want. And the damned Law has it in for me, I swear, so I will never get anything I want. Hence, the best and safest option is to not see anything at all and live your life normally with a future you can’t begin to guess.
–
Jack will have a new entry that should amuse you later on today. Don’t forget to check it out! AndCollecting a Library has a new review this week that you definitely shouldn’t miss. And Lochinvar has returned!! Believe me, you can’t miss her entries, they are beyond incredible.
The Midnight Screening has only one review this week, I’m afraid. I spent most of the week on FlashForward. But The Legend of 1900 made my top ten list after the first watch. It is incredible and perfect and just wonderful. Watch it, watch it now.
Besides that, I still need to watch the new White Collar ep with Jack tonight. For those not yet watching the series, come on, guys, pick up the damned slack!! And Dizzy, I am proud of you. Watch more. Enjoy more. More Mozz to come. Anna and Wena and I are watching Supernatural on Saturday night. Feel free to join us if you’re keen and awake!
Stay classy guys. Till next Castiel day…
Bandit, OUT.
We’re All Immortal…
…until we die.
But are we dead then as well? Sure, our body dies and begins to decompose and return to the earth from whence it came while our soul either goes to heaven or to the sky depending on your faith, but are we gone?
I’m not sure if it’s terrifying or commendable that our generation more than others is seeking to achieve immortality in any and all ways possible. I could even go as far as to say that we are returning to old-school ideas about how to do this. Sure, science and medicine has developed incredibly over the last decade alone, but it is not the physically immortality that I want to address today, more the spiritual one.
Our generation relies on technology to catalogue our daily lives. More than that, to catalogue and advertise our every move. How often do you read a Tweet that says something akin to “I just got up but I am so tired!” or a Facebook post heralding a new and exciting opinion to the world at large? Whether we read these messages and respond to them or not, they are all adding to this generation’s immortality.
Perhaps you disagree. Perhaps you think that the alchemists had the right idea in trying to find the Philosopher’s Stone (around well before Harry Potter, I can assure you, but more on that later) and immortalizing themselves as undying humans. You can accuse me and say that what I’m writing is simply another attempt at “immortalizing” myself. I won’t deny this, it is another way. But what you have to think about, agree with it or not, is that perhaps the idea of immortality itself has changed; from our physical ability to stay alive forever to our ability to influence people after we die.
How often have you heard someone say that “this music is immortal” or “that book will never get old”? Of course these are figurative turns of phrase and not meant to be taken literally, but let’s humor the comments for a while and take them literally for once. How is it possible for music to be immortal or a book to be ageless? Clearly we are personifying the inanimate objects, since neither music nor books are or ever were living. They are immortal in the sense that they still hold influence over masses – though now perhaps not as large – of people. Is that not true immortality?
What was the point of finding a way to stay alive forever? The point, in my opinion, was to be able to influence people for many years after others of your generation have passed on. Be this influence through knowledge and learning or knowledge of battles and fighting, it doesn’t matter. What matters is the idea of influence.
To use a clichéd expression yet again on this blog of clichéd expressions, in the battle for immortality, the pen has won out over the sword. There have been many great warriors in our time and the times far before ours, some great and noble people who have redefined warfare and strategy throughout history. But although they have imparted their knowledge and skills, they have not survived to be immortal physically. Their ideas have lived on, true, and many, but the people themselves have died.
So is this generation trying to stay immortal through their unending Twitter posts and Facebook messages? Undoubtedly, but I believe few know they are doing it. For us it’s all in the “now”. I have to get a reply now, I have to see an action sequence in this movie now, I would rather see a film than read a book since it takes too long in a book to get anywhere… We all do it, don’t deny you do. If not with the examples listed then certainly with other aspects of our lives. We are a generation brought up on believing that things should happen quickly. I currently have a very slow internet connection, and I feel as though my life has come to a halt. And yet I don’t recall the time when broadband was a dream and dialup was a reality.
We’re so conditioned to accept and thrive in this fast-paced world that anything hindering this pace scares or bores us.
Because of this, we rely on our fast-paced world to allow us to immortalize ourselves faster. I mentioned Harry Potter in passing, earlier, not just to link it to the Philosopher’s Stone but to bring it about as a genuine example of this generation’s immortality.
How many books can you name that have outlived their publication date? Perhaps that is unfair… how many books can you name that have outlived the decade in which they were published? Many have survived and most are still available, but very, very few are memorable. Harry Potter, love it or hate it, is a series that will easily survive not only its decade – it has, for those who have been with Harry from the start – but also, in my opinion, perhaps this half century. It will go down in history as one of the books of “this generation” and continue to influence people years after its initial readers and author have passed on. It will join the ranks of books by people like Mark Twain, Arthur Conan Doyle and Ray Bradbury. For people with a slightly wider range, authors like Chaucer, Clifford Simak and Arkadi and Boris Strugatsky.
And is that not the point?
When people say they are searching for immortality, I wonder if they’re searching in the right place. Yes, we have been able to slow the aging process and manipulate it to rather radical and sometimes grotesque levels, but is that really immortality? People who are 90 looking like their great grandchildren? They have less influence as people and more influence as experiences to learn from and steer clear of, personally. I think that if someone wishes to find immortality they have only to turn to the things we take most for granted: music, books, films… anything left behind by people who were here before us.
Tell me, am I wrong?
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Bandit here.
Wow, ok, I actually didn’t think I would write this year. But something was nagging at the back of my mind making me want to at least try again. Perchance this year will be more exciting to read about than the year previous considering I will actually have a semblance of a life this year. I also nearly missed the Thursday deadline. I thought about making it Friday this year but as I will have Wednesdays off this semester it gives me an opportunity to write an entry while I have some spare time.
I’ve updated and cleaned up the site a little; my info page no longer exists and my sidebar is a lot more exciting (truly, it is) finally, my Top Ten Movies List has been updated. Feel free to peruse at will.
I can’t guarantee quality on this blog, or entries as deep and meaningful as this (consider this “late night drivel” and file it away as “things to ignore when V gets pensive”) but I can guarantee that I will try my utmost to make this blog entertaining and give you something to read every week on the Friday lunch break. I can also guarantee typos and larger than one-word answers to comments ;)
So I guess… until next week, then :)
Bandit, OUT.
